Things aren’t always as they seem

Don’t we look good in this picture? This was in 2010. It was not a good time in our lives but it looked like it was from the outside.

-Things arent always as they seem. I don’t care if you lie, steal, cheat, whatever. I know that there is a reason for your actions. I will never judge you. Something happened to you that you are acting like this and I am sorry. I know this so well because it was me- I had some dark days my friends. And the only way I could deal was to act snooty and not talk to anyone because I didn’t want any questions asked about me or my messed up issues. I might have looked ok on the outside but was literally dying inside. I looked as though I had it all- new house, great husband ,new cars vacations everything but I didn’t have it all—in fact I was empty inside. My marriage was falling apart—no matter how much I starved myself I hated the mirror, I envied and was jealous of those who had more than me and I just wanted to keep buying stuff to make me feel good and it never did. Yes, I can blame this on a lot of things—my dad left us when I was young and then we reconnected later in life than the Lord took him from me—but that’s not it I had a wonderful childhood with my amazing mom—we all have things that happened to us right? Nope that wasn’t why I was a mess…. I was a mess because I couldn’t give my husband kids. We tried for along time a couple years in fact but wasn’t happening. I acted as though I wanted to leave him because I wasn’t in love anymore, this is what I told him and what I told myself but really I wanted to leave because I couldn’t give him kids and I knew he wanted them. The reason I am saying this is because if you knew me or ran into me in those years I am sorry. I may have been unkind or unfriendly or not said anything at all- but I couldn’t. My anxiety took over my body my mind and my life! You see, I may have been acting this way on the outside but inside I wanted to die- literally. This is what I learned…never judge never ever judge because you have NO CLUE what one is going through on the inside—no clue at all. Again, I don’t care if you are totally rude to me or judge me in any way that you want too- I still love you and I am sorry that something makes you act or feel this way. You are not alone. Thank you who all who stood by me through those awful years- it wasn’t me….. I have finally found me again and I am so thankful! Don’t get me wrong though my life is not in any way perfect I still have my days- like yesterday when Duke hit me in the face with a toy and I started sobbing and locked myself in my room for a good minute—I mean it hurt but come on drama queen—But now

My life is complete. It is good even on the bad days it is good not only because God finally gave me children it is good because I kept fighting through the storm and never gave up it is good because I have learned compassion and sympathy for others it is good because I leaned no matter what I buy or have in material things I know I would be able to give it all away tomorrow and be happy. If you are struggling you are not alone….. always pray and never give up there is a reason for your struggle it will all fall into place. The storm will end and the sun WILL shine again.

How to survive MARRIAGE

Someone once told me when I was 7 months pregnant with the second set of twins “Did you know that the divorce rate for couples with multiples is 70%?”. Um….no. But thanks for letting me know– so basically my chance for divorce then is 140%? Ok…….

Listen, marriage is work– it is hard fricken work. And if you are thinking to yourself, What? No it’s not, I love being married!” then you are a newlywed and sit down and enjoy the ride right now because it gets worse— much much worse. Like, take your little problems now, my newlywed friend, and multiply them by 100 and that is where you are gonna be soon enough.

I am not going to say that I hate being married, I dont hate being married- Would I ever get married again? #Doubtful

Here is the thing, Kevin is my best friend and I am his. I love him and he loves me- but right now, right now in this moment of our lives- I feel, as I am sure he does, I feel like we are running a small business and our employees are 4 little kids and 2 dogs along with loads of dirty laundry, growing grass and a house that constantly smells like pee. The floors are discusting everything is dusty and I feel like I am being buried alive with toys……toys everywhere and piss- did I mention our house, van and myself smell like pee all the time.

I sometimes let this all get to me- I feel like I am never gonna get ahead with all of the chores and am I playing with my kids enough and am I making an effort to have a date night with the hubs and did I get my run in and my cooking and Oh, crap we are out of milk! It takes a toll trying to stay ahead of it all- I feel like I am constantly failing some days.–ok, but back to the marriage. So, how do you keep your marriage going with all this chaos… advice….don’t stress about it so much. If you have a good partner- one that loves you and knows you, then they will know that this is just a season in your lives and in your marriage. They know that before kids you were in love and there was a reason for the love you felt– it is still there but right now it is just kind of on the back burner- yes sometimes you make time for eachother- date nights, weekend getaways– its all good, good things to do– but if you dont get to do that it is ok. Some of us dont have anyone to help us with our kids which makes it even harder to get away together and spend time alone…but one day– one day so, so soon you will be able to do all of the things you used to do together alone. So, if right now you cant….right now its just too hard to line up a babysitter, find something to do on a tight budget, decide who is going to be the sober driver and then you finally get to where you are going and all you talk about is baby Tommy’s first tooth you found today or the fact that everyone pooped on the potty and wiped there own butts– its ok…its totally fine. We are there- and if you are not there now- you will be and if you are past this you know what I am saying… dont judge yourself— dont judge your marriage. We are all different and our marriages are all unique. That is what makes us- us and what makes our marriage work. It might seem like I have all my ducks in a row and my marriage and kids are all happy all the time– but that couldn’t be farther from the truth. I have just as many problems in this house as you do in yours– maybe more……This is the life though….dont be so hard on yourself or your partner one day soon you will have your groove back and its going to be better than it was before — i know it!

Mediterranean Veggie Pizza (cold and GOOOOOOOD)

I am at a friends gathering this past weekend and the dip of the night, for me anyway, was this amazing, creamy flavor-filled Mediterranean-ish dip. I asked my friend Marah the recipe- which was given to her by our friend Ben, super easy! But I wanted to make a way to not make it a dip but kind of a mealish- or pizza, if you will…..

So I put her recipe on a crust! AND IT WAS AMAZING!!! It was- lower carb yes but filled with so much flavor I cant even….this will be a perfect dish to pass at your next gathering too! Healthy and tasty!

Trying to stay on track at parties is tough- so this can be your little secret to not totally disrupting your health eating habits— you don’t have to tell anyone its healthy!!

The Crust:

In microwave heat 2 cups shredded Mozzarella plus 4 TBS of cream cheese ( I used chive but you can use whatever )for about 2 minutes and stir well…add this to a standing mixer if you can if not a hand mixer can work. Now pour in ½ C almond flour or carbquik plus ½ c riced cauliflower (frozen veggie section) plus 1 TBS of baking powder and 1 egg. Mix well and spread on greased pan or 9 x 13 inch cake pan could work—I wish I would have even made it bigger maybe like a cookie sheet?….bake for about 20 minutes or until golden.

Let cool-

Top with

1 container of hummus- I used garlic it was amazing!! Then spread on top of the hummus about ½- 1 of plain greek yogurt …now top with whatever floats your boat.. I used

Chopped spinach

Chopped tomato

Chopped colored peppers

Chopped cucumber

And it was AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!

I wish I had olives but I didn’t….

You will LOVE THIS- I promise

Mine made about 16 servings…but cut how you like. This is a great alternative to the flour filled butter filled sour cream filled veggie pizza we all know and love.

I choose almond flour and carbquik and these lower carbish recipes because of the low glycemic index. Basically using these will help to not spike your blood sugar and have you come crashing down in hunger again quickly…. Just one reason of many!

Enjoy !!

Key Lime Cream Puff (low sugar low carb)

Ok- I am in need of desserts this week- I dont know why but I just am! Here was a GREAT solution to my sweet tooth and the kids!

Key Lime Cream Puff

In a mixer put 8 egg whites and start mixing- this will take a while so I would use a standing mixer….

In another bowl mix together

6 egg yolks

2 TBS stevia or truvia

1 tsp pure vanilla extract

4 oz cream cheese

When egg whites start to form peak ADD IN ¼ tsp of cream of tartar

When egg whites are fully peaked fold in the egg yolk mixture gently….

Spray muffin tin or 2 pie pans

I made 12 Muffins and 1 pie out of this

Scoop heaping spoonfuls in the cupcake tins or divide in the pie pans

Bake at 350 for about 12-15 minutes (watch when golden) this will RAISE A LOT…..

Take out and let cool- it will deflate

Now for the topping- you can choose whatever you like I just did

1 cup of whipping cream plus 2 tsp of truvia plus ½ tsp vanilla and mixed this until fully peaked like whip cream then I mixed in 1 6oz container of key lime greek yogurt

Fill your pie with this OR just place this topping on as you go… taste chilled.

2 servings for 1/2 red and ¼ blue—that’s a good guess 

This is a bit tedious and time consuming BUT I think well worth it-

You could cut this in half to not make so many!


I have to tell you this is the best thing I have made YET!! I am not kidding…I usually wait a while on posting recipes because I HAVE A TON to post but this had to be moved front and center for you!!

BBQ Chicken Bacon Ranch TARTE

*I call it a tart because of the crust and because it sounds fancy and professional. Lol

THIS IS NOT as hard as it sounds….yes, it might take you a few extra minutes but WORTH IT….first the CRUST….

I use a standing mixer…place in

1 egg

½ C carbquik or almond flour

½ C frozen riced cauliflower

1 TBS baking powder

DON’T MIX YET…first microwave 2 oz of cream cheese and 2 C Shredded mozzarella for 1 minute and 30 seconds- stir and add to the mixture


Once kind of dough-ish spray a 9×13 IN casserole dish and press in this as the crust—YOU WILL NEED TO ADD more flour to your hands to do this as it will be sticky….

BAKE at 425 for 15-20 minutes until golden-

Now for the “casserole”

-1 whole rotisserie chicken (I bought mine organic at ALDI then placed in the INSTA POT with some water and olive oil for about 20 minutes high pressure)but you can just buy one cooked if that is easier!

-1 package CENTER CUT BACON- it costs more but is way healthier- as healthy as bacon can be…I place my bacon on cookie sheet on foil or parchment paper and put in oven on Broil until crispy but you can just pan fry it- just make sure to place it on paper towels to get the grease off when done.

-3 garlic cloves

-1 onion

-1 bag of shredded cabbage

-other half of the bag of frozen riced cauliflower that you used for crust

-1 green pepper

-1 pouch of ranch season

On medium heat Place a large sauce pan with olive oil covered (about 1-2 TBS)


Sauté these until tender….

Now add in you COOKED CHICKEN that you shredded and I use a scissors and cut up my bacon…stir around a bit…


16 OZ tomato sauce

¼ C of apple cider vinegar

¼ C truvia (or sugar sub)

1/8 C Worcestershire Sauce

1 TBS paprika

1 tsp garlic powder

1tsp Ground Mustard

1 tsp chili powder

1 tsp cumin

Mix this all in and let simmer a few minutes..Place ON THE CRUST that you just baked and top with 1C shredded Cheddar. Bake at 425 for about 30 minutes or until cheese is golden.

1 heaping cup 1 blue 1 red 1 green

Skinny Cheesy VEGGIE soup

Cheesy Vegetable Soup (skinny)

In a large pot pour a few tbs of olive oil and set on Medium heat.


1 head cauliflower

2 C broccoli

1 onion

3 garlic cloves

4 large carrots

1 bag of frozen riced cauliflower ( freezer veggie section)

Sauté these until somewhat tender

Now add

1 carton of vegetable broth

1 cup of almond milk (or any milk)

1 C cheddar shredded

1 C shredded mozzarella

Salt and pepper to taste

¼ C almond flour or carbquik (or any flour choice)

Bring to a boil but CONSTANT stirring so doesn’t burn to the bottom……once boiling turn down to simmer and stir a bit more then let set on low for an hour or so.

1 C for a green and ¼ blue (heaping cup- even like 1.5)


Reasons to wake up EARLIER than you need to !

Reasons to wake up an hour earlier than you need to.

1. You have time to yourself. Time to think and reflect.

2. You have time to plan your day- to set your intention.

3. It is so so peaceful.


5. You can plan your meals and pack your lunch

6. You can journal

7. You are not RUSHED

8. It sets the tone for the day- to be ahead of the day.

9. You can do some yoga stretches

10. You can talk yourself into having a GOOD DAY!

3 things everyone should do before you feet hit the floor….

1. Drink 8 oz of water (keep it next to your bed)

2. Say 3 things you are grateful for

3. Set your intention/prayer for the day

I hope with these tips you can get closer to your goals….dont have goals? Make some!